Wednesday, May 6, 2009

counterproductive

Can I just vent a little bit today?

I just have to say that sometimes my family can be really lame. I spent Saturday evening being criticized for being fat. I'll be the first to admit that I've gained weight since I had my snowboarding accident a few years ago. But do I really need to be reminded by seemingly caring relatives?

Not really.

The criticisms ranged from "Wow, you look wider than your fiance" to "When are you going to start dieting?" Oh and did I mention the part where my aunt said I couldn't have any ice cream with my cake because I need to lose weight - in front of everyone? At least I know when to censor myself - I didn't tell all of them to STFU!


I cried in the car on the way home. *sigh*

It's not like I haven't been thinking about it constantly. And it's not like I haven't been working on getting in shape. I'm sorry I'm not wafer thin like I was when I was 12. I'm not exactly happy with where I am, but I'm not sitting on my arse and doing nothing either.

For the last couple months I've been doing yoga twice a week, pilates once a week, and running once or twice a week. I just started running to and from my pilates class too.

And with encouragement from my friend Jackson, we've been waking up early Mondays-Thursday and work out/run "together". We live pretty far away from each other but every morning around 6 am we text each other to get up and get out there! Knowing that there's someone else waking up and getting her heart rate pumping really forces me to not wuss out.

At least there aren't any more family gatherings coming up. I don't know if I can stand there and smile and be respectful to my elders very much longer.

Anyway, I guess it should motivate me more or something. Or make me want to go binge.

PS: The photo is from the 5K I did a couple weeks ago. I've got one coming up this Sunday and an 8K the following Sunday. Can I get a "GOOOOOOOO LRB"??

13 comments:

tam pham said...

GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I TOTALLLY know how you feel...your family must be cut from the same cloth as mine. I've been tormented by my family about my weight for as long as I can remember. During this past Xmas, my family members were like "Way to go, you're halfway there to being at a decent weight for your wedding!"! I wanted to be like "Merry Fucking Xmas and Fuck you!".

I'm so proud of all the extra work (pilates, running, etc) that you've been doing. You're BEAUTIFUL. Don't listen to your retarded family.

Love,
TAM

Couture Carrie said...

People can be so clueless and insensitive, especially family . . . I'm sorry for your bad experience - you look to be in incredible shape to me! Congrats on the 5k!

xoxox,
CC

jack said...

don't let them get to you. these people are from hk where you would be a size large and i hafta have stuff custom made. 100lbs is not normal for american adults, man! you're from america, where we live on a higher protein diet. you put in work and YOU'RE HEALTHY and YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY with your own self image. you're not a sloth, nor a glutton so why do you hafta be wafer thin? metabolism is a mofo. do what you want, f*ck the rest. make whatever changes you wanna make for you, not for nobody else.

Anonymous said...

Got to love how blunt Asians can be. I've been there with the "Oh, you've gained weight!" In fact, there is a Mother's Day get together that I'm not looking forward to this Saturday.

Don't let others get you down. You're doing great and staying healthy. You should be really proud of yourself for getting up at 6 AM to exercise.

Hanako66 said...

I'm so sorry, that's horrible.

My mom and dad made some pretty rude remarks with I had gained about 10 lbs last year...I have since lost it, but couldn't believe how mean they were about such a small amount of weight! My mom is my high school weight so they have pretty high expectations.

Fabi said...

you deserve a ton of props. you exercise a ton more than i do! and i hear comments from family (specifically my mom 24/7), you gotta just brush it off. congrats on the 5k! that must have been so tough!

Baby Mama said...

You should seat those "caring" family members in the nose bleed section at your wedding. Don't listen to them. I know you will be a beautiful, glamourous bride!

PS any time you want to indulge in Carls Jr you give me a call!

little bits of splendor said...

It's an Asian thing right? Anytime I run into a Korean woman, I get the same criticism about my weight and my lack of children because apparently I'm getting old. And then I go home and eat a pint of ice cream "cuz that'll show them!"

Good job on the working out! Don't let them get to you!

Jodi Rohitasuke said...

Angie...I haven't seen you in years, but based off your photos, I think you look fabulous!!!! As for the "family comments"...believe me, I know how you feel. It took me 2 years to lose the 50 pounds of baby fat I put on with my son and a few months ago, my mother told me that I looked like I was going to have another baby. I just about died...and cried after she left my house. On top of that, I visited my familly in Japan this last Jan...they are the same way, but were a little kinder than usual. Past trips...as soon as I get off the damn airplane, they say..."wow, you're so big...you have so much meat on you!"...there's never a "so nice to see you...blah blah blah". So hang in there...I think you are just right. And besides...just because you are super skinny, doesn't mean you are healthy.

Just my two cents...
Jodi

Karen said...

They make me so angry some times!!!!!!!!

Tiffany said...

Asian relatives. gotta love them right?

all I have to say is that you are doing fantastic with your working out! I wish I was as dedicated as you!

It's hard not to let those comments get to you but as long as you are happy with yourself that is all that matters.

K said...

Love you LRB. My favorite is when my mom says I'm fat and then demands to know why I'm not eating more of her cooking! LOL ;)

Diabolina Da Fashionista said...

ugh I hate being asian sometimes ;)
people have no idea how to relate to each other. don't they know we are already harder on ourselves than they could ever be. ughs.

you keep doing what you are doing to feel good and healthy and confident. that's the recipe for true beauty. period.

tell everyone to f off.

signed,
willing to come up and regulate.